Every time some heterosexual person decides to be sweet and drops an IM asking 'Hi! How's your day?' I always have to fake that I've had some normal 'heterosexual' girl day, about how my mum prepared a yummy steamboat and how I didn't want to wake up for church at 10:30am this morning, omitting all the crummy details of my diry little secret of a life. Shows how much I actually hide / portray a different image of myself to the outside world, when each time some heterosexual person checks in on me my mind stares at the words on the screen and I form sentences in my mind that will only, stay in my mind : "I had an okay day, could've been better though. I have a girlfriend, that's more than perfect to me, a group of friends that are all gay - which I love, with what's left of my heart. I spent certain parts of the day (such as now) thinking about my girlfriend, and the unmentionable. And my heart breaks everytime I imagine her staring into someone else's eyes, whispering I, love you.."

I h8 sharing, even if it may be in the past. I don't know how to deal with it, because this time it's different. And I don't know how to give or love anymore, but you're still here and I don't know how much longer that's going to last. Probably why I'm scared to death of the word 'Future' because in this non-heterosexual life,

Nothing lasts forever.